So, Mad Jens Lehmann is back to terrorise opponents, his own defenders, and Manuel Almunia. Should you ever go back, though? We look at four notable Premier League comeback attempts…
Southall for Bradford in 2000
Neville Southall (Bradford City, 2000)
Throughout the eighties, ‘Super Nev’ helped Everton win five major trophies and was seen as one of the best goalkeepers in world football. After his natural, physical decline in the late nineties led to him losing his place in the Everton first team, rather than retire, Southall dropped down the leagues, and I remember seeing him play at Kingstonian for Doncaster Rovers in the Conference in 1998. He was forty years old, enormous, and conceded twice in a 2-1 defeat. However, amazingly, the fat goalkeeper had not yet sung; in 2000, with Premier League Bradford City’s goalkeeper Matthew Clarke injured, manager Paul Jewell offered Southall a sensational return to the top flight. Southall accepted, and made his debut at the age of 41 in a home game against Leeds United. Although by now completely immobile, the Welshman’s reading of the game remained and he didn’t disgrace himself as Bradford lost 2-1. His career still managed to squeeze six more clubs further down the pyramid, before he retired aged 44. Four years ago, he took his own daughter, a student, to court over the return of some medals he had ‘given’ her. She had to pay £6,000 in legal costs. He was said to be “pleased with the outcome.” Evil man.
Captain Carr for Brum
Stephen Carr (Birmingham City, 2009-present)
A story so improbable it wouldn’t look out of place in a Hollywood sports movie, Stephen Carr’s return to football must secure his as one of the more unlikely comebacks in football history. In 2008, following his release from Newcastle United where he had endured a torrid, injury-hit four years, Carr had an unsuccessful trial at League One side Leicester City. In December that year, having failed to find a club, he announced his retirement, aged 32, and his playing career appeared to be over. However, three months later he was tempted back into football by Championship side Birmingham City with a one-month contract to cover for injuries. Carr then won a contract to keep him at St. Andrew’s until the end of the season, and having helped City secure promotion, he signed on for a further two years. This season he has captained Birmingham to a League Cup trophy, the club’s first major honour since 1963. ‘Indian summer’ doesn’t quite cover it.
Sol Campbell (Arsenal, January – May 2010)
After his famous half-time meltdown at Highbury in February 2006, the hitherto immense Sol Campbell embarked on what seemed an irreversible decline. Released by Arsenal, he was signed by Portsmouth, where his form steadily worsened before being allowed to leave on a free transfer in 2009. Then, in one of two amazing transfer moves which were to follow, he signed for League Two Notts County for a reported £40,000-per-week… for five years.
Big Sol came back last year
Of course, the financial realities of that short era of Notts County’s lavish spending have since been revealed, so while it isn’t a surprise now, Campbell’s decision to walk away from County after just one game (a 2-1 defeat to Morecambe in September) was universally taken as an admission that he was no longer even good enough for League Two. Then he started training at Arsenal. This in itself wasn’t a surprise; Arséne Wenger has long had a policy of allowing former players – and, in David Beckham’s case, other clubs’ players – to use the London Colney facilities in order to maintain their fitness. What was completely unexpected was the announcement that, having spent three months on the training ground, Campbell signed a contract until the end of the season. Naturally, having been apparently out of his depth for Notts County, Campbell’s signing was treated with incredulity, but despite being described by the Guardian’s Sean Ingle as playing ‘like a creaking wardrobe’, Campbell’s four-month spell back at the club restored his reputation. It seems his committed displays represented no more than a swan song, however, as he is currently struggling to get into Newcastle’s side after piling on the pounds over the summer.
"Dogged" Stan Collymore
Stan Collymore (no-one, 2006)
The comeback attempt by the talented but volatile and unstable Stan Collymore was probably the worst of all time. In 2006, having been retired for five years, a 35-year-old Collymore declared that he could still be the best striker in the Premier League. He insisted he was embarking on an intensive three-week training course in Tenerife, and claimed that “a month from today I guarantee I will be able to stand side by side with any striker in the country.” As it turned out, he probably was able to stand side by side any striker in the country, but he was far less likely to run as fast, work as hard or score as many goals as the vast majority of them. Nobody signed him, and he claimed he’d changed his mind because of the ‘sneering’ tabloid reaction to his announcement. Soon after the publicity, of course, he was offered a living in full-time broadcasting. Don’t call me cynical. Incidentally, Collymore had a turn alongside Sharon Stone in 2006′s Basic Instinct 2, doubling the number of shaven cunts on-screen.
